


The Great Pumpkin Caper

by Predec2



Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Halloween, Humor, M/M, One Shot, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-22
Updated: 2014-09-22
Packaged: 2018-02-18 10:23:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2344952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Predec2/pseuds/Predec2
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The boys' favorite activity takes an unusual turn.  One-fic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Great Pumpkin Caper

 

_Someone posted a photo of something on Twitter, and I couldn't get the image out of my head. This was the result.  
_

 

DISCLAIMER:   QAF and its characters are the sole property of Showtime and Cowlip Productions. No copyright infringement is intended.   
  
=========================================  
  
"Justin, don't think this is going to be a regular occurrence every week, by the way."  
  
  
I snorted.  Now why would I think that, even though a certain someone does feel the need to have his ‘itch scratched' every once in a while? It must be some type of kink for him, I decided. But it didn't matter. If he needed a certain part of his anatomy ‘scratched' from time to time, then I will be only too willing to oblige him.  
  
  
"What was that you said?"  
  
  
"Nothing," I hurriedly reply as I lick my lips over the image of a naked Brian sprawled out in front of me.  It was close to Halloween, and I was definitely getting a treat tonight instead of a trick.  I had to stifle a giggle over my unintentional joke as I heard an exasperated huff come from beneath me. It was muffled due to Brian's head lying on his folded arms, but I heard his demand nonetheless.  
  
  
"Will you fucking get on with it? I'm not some museum exhibit to ooh and ahh over, Justin.  And none of that ‘slow and easy' shit tonight, okay? I'm horny as hell."  
  
  
"Yes, Sir!" I respond like the dutiful, little partner I am in true, soldier fashion.  I could almost see Brian rolling his eyes at me as I grinned, reaching over in the dimly lit room of the bedroom's loft to grab the small tube of lube lying on top of the nightstand, and pulling the drawer open to retrieve a condom packet. In the low light, I thought the package looked a little oddly colored, but I just chalked it up to us trying out a new brand.  Thank goodness, I could still use the same ones as my partner, even though Brian, ahem... _filled_ them out a little better.   
  
  
Squirting the liquid onto my fingers and reaching down to prepare my partner - who grunted in reaction just like he normally did when I first pressed in - I soon had him stretched and prepared for my endeavor. Tearing open the packet, I slipped the condom out and threw the discarded package down onto the mattress beside me.  As I began to pull the latex down onto my dick, I sniffed the air. I had always found Brian's smell to be extremely arousing, but this was different. This was more like a...candle aroma?   
  
  
"Justin?"  
  
  
"Huh?"  
  
  
"Have you bought some new kind of cologne? Or a new shampoo or something?"  
  
  
I frowned; apparently I wasn't the _only_ one who smelled it.  "No, just the same old shit you always hate," I quipped.  Brian was always kidding me about the ‘dollar-store' toiletries I was always using - at least, it seemed that way to him. Or course, this is someone who thinks nothing of paying $50 for a fucking tube of aftershave.   
  
  
"Then what IS that shit I smell?"  He turned his head to peer up at me as I shrugged.  
  
  
"Hell if I know," I retorted, dying to proceed with my ‘once-in-a-blue moon' activity.  "Quit stalling," I added sternly, wondering if this was some type of delaying tactic. I don't know why it would be, though, because truthfully Brian _enjoyed_ indulging every once in a while - at least with me as the captain, a fact for which I couldn't be prouder.   
  
  
"I'm NOT stalling," he growled back at me.  "It's just that..."  
  
  
"What?" I asked as I straddled his legs and looked longingly at my hopeful reward.  "Brian..." I know I sounded kind of whiny, but I couldn't help it. I felt *so* close, and yet so far away.   
  
  
I heard him sigh, then, and I knew I was going to get my way after all.  "Okay, Sunshine," he whispered as he smiled up at me with that look that always made my heart flutter.  "Get on with it, then. I'll try to hold my nose in the meantime."  
  
  
I huffed. "Thanks...I think."

* * *

  
_Several Minutes Later..._  
  
  
Feeling quite smug and satisfied with myself in light of my ‘performance' - which, I must add, left my partner feeling totally exhausted and satisfied himself, despite WHAT he might say to the contrary - I lay on top of his sweaty body, just inhaling the unique scent of him - part expensive cologne, part cigarettes, part booze, and just some indecipherable part that was Brian's alone. The smell we had both encountered earlier seemed to have vanished somehow, which was a relief. At the moment, I was still coming down from my immensely mind-blowing orgasm of a few minutes earlier to care anyway.  
  
  
At last, however, I knew I had to pull out of that wondrous place know as Brian's ass, and I slowly slipped out, holding the condom to tie it off as I tossed it down onto the floor beside the bed. Funny - as meticulous as Brian was about the loft, and having everything in its place - when it came to this particular activity, whether it was me or him doing the ‘driving,' he didn't seem to worry about a condom being thrown onto the hardwood floor. Of course, this is also the same man who once held an ‘in-house' orgy where condoms were scattered all over the floor like so many dust bunnies, so why would ONE bother him? Or maybe, uh, three or four...  
  
  
As I turned to flip onto my back, I heard Brian making that sniffing sound again like a bloodhound on the trail of a thief.   
  
  
"What?" I asked, exasperated.  "I told you..."  
  
  
"I know," he replied, still a little out of breath. I silently patted myself on the back - figuratively speaking - for my performance as he added, "But I still smell it."  
  
  
I rolled my eyes, even though I had to admit, I could smell it again now, too.   
  
  
Brian frowned as he apparently tried to decipher exactly what the smell was.  "It kind of smells like...Glade air freshener.  Or a candle.  Spicy. But not a particularly good kind of spicy."  
  
  
"Like my shrimp jambalaya?"  
  
  
Finally, I got Brian to smile. "Yeah, like that," he told me as I smiled back at him.  Even though he had first sampled it during a less-than-pleasant time in our relationship, my shrimp jambalaya had turned out to be one of Brian's favorite meals that I made for him quite often.   
  
  
"No," he told me thoughtfully as he continued to sniff the air.  Finally, I watched as he reached over and picked up the condom packet that I had discarded, holding it up to his nose before he coughed in reaction.  "What the fuck!" he yelled as if it had stung him. "Smell this!"  
  
  
I took the packet away from him and held it up to my nose. I, too, couldn't help gagging at the distinctly artificial smell that overwhelmed me.  "What is going on?" I asked in confusion as Brian took it back from me and reached for his side of the bed to turn up the dimmer switch on our bedside table lamp so he could see the package more clearly.  
  
  
His mouth hung open as he read what the contents contained.  He stared over me at me with ‘that' look as he asked, like he was talking to a recalcitrant child, "Justin, did you go to the store this morning to buy the groceries like you said you were going to?"  
  
  
"Of course I did!" I couldn't help answering a little defensively.  "I told you I would get them, didn't I?  Where do you think the bottled water came from that you found in the fridge when you got home earlier?  The water fairy?  If you would just agree to home water delivery..."  
  
  
Just like on cue, Brian interrupted me.  "I am NOT drinking something that was regurgitated from the Susquehanna!   I only drink..."  
  
  
"...Fuji water," I dutifully answered as he nodded.  He arched an eyebrow at me as I told him wearily, "Yes, Sir Kinney, I did go to the grocery store this morning."  I averted my eyes, though, feeling slightly guilty about telling him a little white lie.   
  
  
"Okay...then would you like to explain why you decided to buy THESE?  Are you fucking out of your gourd?"  
  
  
I scowled in confusion as he smacked the smelly packet down onto my chest.  "Ow!" I snapped as I picked it up to examine it.  It WAS an odd color.  An _orange_ color. Brian NEVER bought condoms that were in orange packets. My mouth hung open as I read what it said on the opened package:  
  
  
  
  
  
"Oh, shit..."  
  
  
"Is this your idea of a joke, Sunshine?"   
  
  
"Uh..."  I reached for my cellphone to dial a speed number.  "I can explain..."  
  
  
"What the hell are you doing?" Brian asked me as I shushed him with my hand like I was batting a fly.  "I asked you a question, Justin!"  
  
  
"Mom?"  
  
  
"Hi, honey!  What's up?" she chirped back at me.  
  
  
"Uh, Mom...you know when you went to the grocery for me this morning when I got called into town for that appointment at the art gallery?"  
  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
  
"About that box of condoms you bought for us..."  
  
  
I heard Brian groan in realization as he flopped down onto the bed in defeat, knowing it was either a choice of no more sex for the rest of the night...or the smell of spiced pumpkin on his dick.   
  
  
A few moments later - after I thanked my mom for her help, but told her politely to _please_ never buy the scented condoms ever again (almost gagging as she raved about how she and her newest boyfriend just LOVED them) - I snapped my phone shut and turned apologetically to my partner.  
  
  
I didn't have time to say anything, however, as he promptly jumped on top of me, and reached for another condom packet from the dresser drawer.  "We're taking a shower afterward," he told me as I grinned.  
  
\-------------------------------------  
  
 _A/N:  In case you're wondering...no, they don't really exist - thank God..._


End file.
